“Don't poke your nose into other’s problems”

This is usually my constant affirmation. I have this urge to fix things, people or anything depending on my OCD. I leave the plates in the sink even in a stranger’s house (I thank my aunt for instilling this into me). Sometimes I even offer to help cleaning depending on how well I know them. Now that is a good habit. My other poking habit is i listen to conversations. Not that I am this creepy stalker (which I was once anyway), but i have this tendency to absorb reality. People and the way they talk. Their accents, behavior and other funny details. I am an artist and its my excuse for research. I do know when to draw the line. I don't press my ears to a closed door or wall. Sometimes i even miss the conversation my friend is having sitting right next to me. It needs to have quality to catch my attention.

Yesterday i was sitting and waiting for few friends in a Chinese restaurant. Waiting is the annoying thing I happen to do very often since I am always ahead of time. So now my friends are partially to be blamed for my habit. I end up catching a conversation between a 40 something year old man and a 12 to 14 year old boy. The book I was trying to read was bad anyway. I heard the dad asking his son about school and friends. That grabbed my attention. The son patiently answered like he really wanted to share. How many teenagers do that? (Not like i am the 40 year old dad) Then the topic turned to women. Father asked if the son liked anyone in school. The son just giggled. I wanted to pull that kid’s cheeks. Now lets just focus on non creepy side of me.

The father rehearsed something in his head and said “You know just because me and your mom didn't work out it doesn't mean marriages never work" The kid just kept listening (surprisingly he looked comfortable having this conversation) “I really loved your mom and tried but its unfortunate that it didn't work. We even tried for you but it just dint” I really respected this man. Not bothered about my opinion he continued “Now you must be happy to have two dads” The boy smiled and nodded. Father asked very cautiously “He takes good care of you right?” The son gobbled down a wanton in one go nodding yes. “I am sure he will take good care of you. Anytime you feel low and want to talk to somebody, will you call me?” One more wanton disappeared in agreement.

After the plate was empty the boy asked “Are you not going to find anyone?” Father said “I am looking desperately. I need to find a woman faster before you do” The kid laughed his ass glad to hear that. Then he started teasing his dad about some colleague. Father went red for once. It was a moment. “I will move on son. I promise. I needed my time. Now I am over her. And yeah that girl is beginning to look good these days” The son squealed in excitement and started singing songs. It was chaos. It was like boys night only in a Chinese restaurant and with assorted age groups. That's when I realized that I wasn't actually part of this conversation and before I could hide my blushing face it was too late. The father just looked and I shrugged. “I’m sorry I dint mean to” He said “No issues. You can join us if you want” I was helpless but still said “I wish I could. Your table seems more fun for now. I am just waiting to have conversations about swine flu and gym workouts”

He smiled and went back bonding with his son. The son had later surprised his dad with a cake for father’s day. :) I am not a sucker for a Hallmark moment but I love to see honest affection. It better than seeing Father’s day discount ADs from a heath clinic (Why would someone gift a voucher from a clinic to their dads?)or a watch store. Leave it to us to put a price tag on this too.

Being a father takes so much from a man. But all the effort seems so worthwhile. There is this new breed or generation of fathers who seem to be so damn good. My brother, brother in laws, friends. I am glad its not the same old anymore.

Here’s a happy fathers days to all the Fathers who are good and also to fathers that try. Happy Father’s day to me too since I am sure I would make a good dad one day.

As for Times of India’s astrology about “Don't poke your nose into other’s problems”, Take a hike TOI.

Where do I belong?

I walked the crowded Ranganathan street.
Vegetable vendors pushing me aside as they pulled their carts.
Me unsuccessfully trying to tread around the slimy mud.
Tuition books in hand, I promised not to come back here ever again.

I walked the lonely dark roads of Jubilee Hills.
Occasionally hiding my cigarette from the passing cars and people.
Listening to my rhythmic footsteps from time to time.
I wished someone were walking with me and holding my hand.

I walked almost the entire stretch of Marine drive.
Holding her hand and saying nothing during the entire walk.
People going about their own business like an army of ants.
I just kept looking at the sunset, lost deep in thought.

I walked through the bustling Orchard road.
Trying hard to find a Starbucks at this late hour.
People spraying foam all over, spreading the Christmas cheer.
I tried hard not to participate, but the inner child gave in.

I walked through the unknown roads of Seattle.
Walking down to the mall, to kill time.
My breath haunted me like it was the only sound I could hear.
Walking slowly, letting the rain take over the silence in my head.

I walked through MG road in the wee hours.
Happy high from a long night of drinking.
Singing songs loudly, walking with no sense of direction.
Just happy that life is good, at least for this moment.

I walked through the road near the temple in Shirdi.
Feeling like I was being followed by this invisible person.
I dint have to turn to see a bearded man behind me.
I could hear him calling out to me even though he wasn't there.

I walked the platforms of Pondicherry.
Thinking this is where I wanted to end up eventually.
Walking slowly just to buy my daily bread.
Saying 'Hello' to all my fellow walkers with a toothless smile.

I walked many roads that I can't remember.
Some roads only once and others over and over again.
Every time a new memory - because of the company, not the place.
The destination never mattered but the trip always did.

Pleasures of being a late comer

When your friends rave about a movie or a book and try marketing it big time, doesn't it annoy you? No? Well it annoys me. It's fine if someone recommends it. But the good old days of recommendation is like a bygone era. Now its all about “You must watch it. It's fucking awesome man. Oh its great. You will be hooked. I’ll watch it again with you.” and all such crap brings about so much unnecessary hype.

Everything. You just name it. Food, phones, movies, set top boxes, monitors, UPS, phone companies, vegetable vendors. There is this constant need to have the best or buy it from a certain special place or brand. When people keep giving gyaan about the 'good' stuff, after a point I don't respect their opinion. Its as repulsive as advice. Because its free.

I, for some reason, am surrounded by these unlimited 'fokat mein gyaan' variety. I end up taking my own sweet time and do stuff as it suits me. I read Q&A & Da Vinci Code just a day before I went to watch the films. I watched Simpsons & Seinfeld only a few weeks ago. And similarly I discovered my addiction to this thing called Pod Casting only very recently.

Not the ones that are Sitcom, Movie or any media campaign based but stuff by a few independent film makers. Its crazy and it reminds me of when we (young wannabe film makers) friends got together in a coffee shop and dissected art over a million coffees. Enough caffeine to charge a country that's beginning a revolution. Not that things have changed much these days. We still talk films sitting vetti in a coffee shop. Only difference being we do little bit more work these days. A fear sometimes creeps in that maybe that's how we will end up. 50 and still talking about making films over coffees and sandwiches.

But this new addiction is an amazingly inspiring boost. Crazy young film makers all over the world making podcasts. I download over 40 short films a day and watch them through the night. I know podcasts are an ancient thing now but I'm hooked. I even give up social meetings for a couple of hours with my iTunes. Steve Jobs, I love you man! (in a very straight spiritual way)

Now I spend less to broaden my horizons on art and also avoid all the nonsensical arguments with friends. Who needs friends when we've got podcasts? That day has after all come.